Sexist Jokes

[TheGuru]

Sexists, but Funny

How many Â*men does it take to open a beer?
Men None. It Â*should be opened when she brings Â*it.
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Why is a Â*Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't Â*even afford a washing Â*machine will probably never be able to Â*support Â*you.
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Why do women Â*have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those Â*"evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How Â*do you know when a woman is about to say something Â*smart?
W hen she starts a sentence with "A man once told Â*me..."
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How do you fix Â*a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a Â*clock on the Â*oven.
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Why do men Â*fart more than women?
Because women can't shut Â*up long enough to build up the required Â*pressure.
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If your dog is Â*barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the Â*front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of Â*course. He'll shut up once you let him Â*in.
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What's worse Â*than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what Â*she's Â*told.
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I married a Â*Miss Right.
I just didn't know her Â*first name was Â*Always.
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Scientists Â*have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by Â*90%.
It's called a Wedding Â*Cake.
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Why do men die Â*before their wives?
They want Â*to.
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Women will Â*never be equal to men until they can walk down Â*the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are Â*sexy.
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In Â*the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man Â*and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has Â*rested.

[Mike]

Funny

Good!